Many websites these days require you to make an "account" to use their services. These "accounts" require you to create a "password" to access them; a "word" you must type to "pass" through the login page. But what if you forget your password? Or, worse, what if a nefarious web bandit gains access to your password and accesses your account AS IF THEY WERE YOU?!
Many people write down their passwords in a "password book." This is a bad idea. Leaving all of your internet credentials in one easy to steal little book is simply asking for disaster. You need what I call a password piggy!
First, procure one guinea pig. Then, shave it completely bald. Next, tattoo your internet passwords onto its body. Once the fur grows back your passwords will be ingeniously concealed, and if you forget them and need reminding you need only to shave the guinea pig.
This is completely secure for multiple reasons. Firstly, no home intruder searching for internet passwords would consider looking under the fur of a guinea pig. Secondly, even if a beastly thief wants to steal your guinea pig for other reasons (say, its alluring cuteness), it has a built-in alarm system. When picked up by a person who is not its owner, a guinea pig will let out a loud "wheek! wheek!" alerting you to the situation and giving you time to fetch your bedside table drawer gun (I presume we all have one) and shoot the home invader dead!
And, if this is not enough security, you need only to create a second "ruse piggy." Fetch another guinea pig, shave it bald in the manner of the last, and tattoo its body with password-like words. Examples you can use include "Wendsleydale123," "totally-real-password1986," or "bumass." A potential ne'er-do-well would have no way of knowing which is the legitimate password piggy, and should leave from the ensuing confusion.
This genius cybersecurity technique should only cost you two guinea pigs, a large back garden enclosure, a permissive tattoo artist, and large quantities of hay and leafy vegetables for the next 5-8 years. But you cannot put a price on peace of mind...