So 2daying again is that time of yere call chrismis, where I get presints and fine foodings and basicaly all we do both catse and humanse is sitaround fooding and lazing and peeping at the televising with are eyeballs.
Big present 4 cattings this year was… A GUN!!! okey, may be not a real gunning wich fire hard and sharp metile bulittings (that would be MEGA ERRORSPONSIBLE and get us injure or worse from mother to getting us), but a toy gun with brite color that human use 2 fire softe and squichy pombpomb balls for going far and chasing and playing with. it uses a big springing to ping the balls very far and i think if i was got hitted by it it would hurt rather a lot, tho it is very neat and HARDCORE COOL present for fun at playtime. aslo we got a stuf toy owl call OWLBERT who is full of nice smelly stuff like some cat nip and sivlerviline or whtever it call. OWLBERT is super nice and cool and fun to playing, but there is only one of him and three cats and it is a big argue over who gets 2 play with him. OVIOUSLY I get to play with him most becuse of mine NATURALE AUFORITY.
yestreday was Chrimsas eve, wich ment a lot of humanse rushing around 2 preparing for the proper crimsats day. Mosty i just sat around like normile watchin the humanse runing about baking cokies and pastrys and Boiling The Beefs and being glade of mine catly freedomes to not having to doing it. as a cat I am doing mine own thing and humanse share the frootings of there workings with me like I am a powerfilled romen empror who can kiling them easly if they donot give me my wantings. I like it that way and i thint if I had 2 orgenise a chirsmas I would not do a good job because i have no monys and no oposingable thubs and i am to small 2 put things in tha oven.
But after the workings are done on crimsas eve, we are all sit down to watch a film and it is always the same flim on cristmas eve every year called muppings cristmas carile (tradutional for us to watch it, wich basicy mean we have watched it every year for a long time). It is a bout a bad man called Ebereezer Scooge who lived in the olden days (not as old as dinosoar times, but older than in grammar and grampar times so it is some where between those twos. i am lernin history) and was mean to ppl and muppings and other cretures even probly. he is even mean to the mupping Kermot Froge, which is like so mean as he is a GOOD GREEN GUY! So then a bunch of ghostlies go into his bedroom at night and show him visions of all sorts of stuff about all the world and the diferent muppings and how the world is good at christmas and u should be nice also. And then Scood decideds that he should be nicing as well and he is nicer to Kermot and his pig wife and there sickerly child TINNY TOM and does not killing him thru lack of monies and gives him monies for big turky and more tasteful puddage and allathat. It is very niceful and festive and the tradition of it make me remembering of old times of mine life in previous years.
Unfortunatly on this yere on chrimsas day I have feeeling a little bit sick, may be from eating a boiled beef too much on mine delicate tummyparts. I have been napping a lot and mother has keeping me compeny a bit and leaving the electricity blanket on all day for my warmings. Mother has drinking a bit of specile juice call “sherrie” (nasty smelling like a stinky marker pen) wich makes her gigling and silly and it is nice 2 see mother more hapy from her usuale matronly sulkage.
Becuse of recent sustained fluing of mine famly, for chrismas all the humanse agree 2 do a modist dinnering on Chrismis (doing only a smal chicken and boiled beefs supper), and do later on a CHRISMIST 2 inafew days once the fluings have fully gonaway (with BIG TURKY MEATINGS and all of the trimmage such as sprotes and parsnops and phiggy phuddings). It is rare and specil 2 get 2 CHRISMAS in 1 yere, and on that day on I think sunday we will doing it I am very loking forwerd. On chris mas 2 perhaps I can get more presints if mother can bothering 2 get up and going to the pets shop b4 that time.
and final… the morile of Scroge has got me thinking about mine own rageful nemersis and personel Scrode GRAHAM CRUMB, who I KNOW FROM THAT DARNT GRIBLY GAZETING spenting his crimis playing with mops with paper plates 4 face in NERTIVITY SHOW like a pafetic shirmping. I am wishing that I could send 3 muppings to him to make him be nicer to me with there hornting but I think muppings are very espensive or an endanger species or rare these days for catching and sikking on bad men, and beyond mother’s meeger bugeting.