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You will never guess what. There is new large bed in my owner’s room, and I am SHOCKED AND APPALLED. The old bed was small and it was fine and it left room for my sneakings. New bed is larger, and heavy, and It Is Not Good To Do.

Old bed was around since I was kitten. I sit on it fine; just soft. But this new bed. Hot Dimmage! This is So Much My Problem. It came in house in large box, which me not allow to play in (rude), and humans spend many hours hitting with hammers to make together, which then they say “Ummm… Goaway Dillon, you are NOT HELPFUL and we Do Not Want You Here.” And they took old bed, my PERSONAL COMFY, away from me forever!!!

Owner say old bed bad. Owner say old bed have “mattress dent” which was “make bad the posture.” UMM??? THAT WAS MY EXECUTIVE CREVICE! I used to SIT IN THERE to DREAM UP MY SCREAMPLAYS and now it is MADE GONE AND TAKED FOREVER. THE NEW BED SHARTED ON ALL MY ASPIRATIONS AND MY HEART IS BREAK! I WILL NEVER WRITE BESTSELLING SCREAMPLAY AND I CAN NEVER WIN IN THIS CRUEL GAME OF WORLD!!!!!!!

I plan to unleash my POWERFUL STREAM OF HOT WEE on the new bed as a form of Protest, which will hopefully force the return of the old bed or APPROPRIATELY SIMILAR SUBSTITUTE WITH BESPOKE SCULPTED EXECUTIVE CREVICE! Alas, my protest has been foreseen in prophecy, so I am RESTRICTED FROM MOTHER’S ROOM UNTIL I LEARN HOW TO BEHAVE!!! But I will avenge my lost comfy, and dream of my screamplay. You mart my wordes.